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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/ykilledyou on 2023-09-02 18:48:39.

I’m mainly looking for some advice from other girls who are like me and maybe can help. I was raised going to Christian school, which was girls-only school as well, and my family never discussed anything personal with each other, except my mum explaining to me the basics of ovulation/periods ect when i got mine (because i had no idea what it was). Maybe that has something to do with my situation now but I don’t know.

I’m wondering what to actually do to initiate intimacy with my husband. I feel like I don’t know what I am doing, even though we have been married for 2 years now and overall our intimacy is good, several times a week (but sometimes missing a week here and there). We are also happy in other areas and I consider him to be my best friend and I love him so much.

We have talked about it, we both agree that we would like for intimacy to be more consistent and frequent because we both have high drives, and my husband has made it clear that he likes when I initiate too. I am not really sure how to though, it sometimes feels awkward and unnatural when I try and initiate and I feel like I’m doing something wrong. I know logically it’s fine and I’m not, but it just feels similar to that. I explained this to him, and I think to some extent he feels the same way about it. We are both young and inexperienced so we are learning everything together, and on top of that we are both very busy most of the time. One of us will initiate and the other person won’t realize or be tired or sick so the other person will think they don’t want to ect. I just don’t know how to get out of that cycle and I guess be more confident about it.

I am just looking for advice if you have ever been in this situation, and how did you overcome it. I feel bad because even though I am someone who prefers when my husband initates, it’s still not fair and I want to make him feel wanted too.