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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/InfiniteFuckery on 2023-07-01 17:33:30+00:00.

My husband (42M) and I (33F) have his daughter, (11F) for a week. I’m fine with this, and have absolutely zero problem with her being here, her mother works full time and so does her brother and she’s too young to stay alone all day.

The issue came about today when I laid down rules for her while she’s here. I don’t think they’re unreasonable but my husband and stepdaughter think they are.

Here they are;

1. no electronics after 11:00pm (that’s no laptop, tablet, switch, etc. she can have a movie on for bed, but I set the timer and take the remote or she’ll stay up all night)
2. awake and out of bed by 11:00am (or she’ll sleep all day)
3. 3 hour’s maximum on her tablet each day
4. she can’t stay in her room all day
5. she helps clean up after dinner (putting dishes in the dishwasher)
6. practice basic hygiene (she’s in the throes of puberty and is in the “I don’t wanna shower/brush my hair/teeth etc. phase)

That’s it. That’s literally it. But apparently I’m “being too harsh” because it’s “summertime”. I’ve also spoken with her mother and she agrees with me on the rules and says they have the same at their house so I’m not sure why I’m being met with so much push back from husband and child.

So, AITA here?

Edit for some extra clarity;

• when I spoke with her mother, my husband was in the room and I had her mother on speaker, he heard the whole conversation

• he initially agreed to help enforce these rules, but changed his stance at the SD’s first tantrum
• these are the same rules she has at her mothers house
• we’ve been together for 5 and a half years
• these were not set out of spite, they were set for consistency