This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Lazy_Tap_1065 on 2023-09-03 10:25:10.

I (24f) have two moms. They’re the parents of me and my four younger siblings. I am equally close to both my moms and when I got engaged I asked them both to walk me down the aisle. I also wanted to do a mom/daughter dance with each of them. My fiancé is on board and said he would ask to dance with his mom. But when we brought this up to his parents they protested that if we’re meant to be doing these dances at the same time, it will look bad if I dance twice while he only dances once. My fiancé said he could always dance with his dad if he was willing and that was a firm no. So then he said he could always dance with his sister. But they said that would still look very strange on the day.

They said I should either do one dance and swap moms halfway through or I should decide which of them is more like a dad to me and pick that mom to dance with.

My fiancé said his parents were crazy and it was an insulting thing to imply one of my moms is the dad of the household. He pointed out my siblings and I have no dad, just moms. I told them it would be sweet to see my future FIL dance with my fiancé and that could make things even. MIL said I was being ridiculous and was not doing a very good job of making a good first impression as a DIL.

My fiancé told his parents they were the unreasonable ones and after that disagreement he asked his sister for a dance at the wedding and she said yes. But his parents are still unhappy and still believe I am trying to show them up in some way. They claim, yet again, I could dance with both moms, but should do it in a single song and not make such a big deal of swapping between them. They accused me of being unreasonable and unwilling to compromise.

I feel bad that so much drama has come from this. I also hate how my FIL could just dance with his son and that would even things out but he acts like it’s some disgusting concept. It feels very much like homophobia at play and maybe not even entirely because I have two moms but because such a big deal was made out of a father/son dance. But maybe I should be willing to compromise here to keep the peace.

AITA?