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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/GuiltyManager7878 on 2023-09-06 15:01:28.

I was exposed to the topic of sex at a young age, though i wasnt molested or anything. Like some kids, they do things and i guess regret it later in life because they realized what they did wasnt right.

I was very hypersexual growing up, during my teen years and now at 21, i read a lot of fanfiction and smut.

I want to have sex so bad, i want to be able to pleasure myself, but the bad memories and the feeling of shame constantly comes back up. When i try to touch myself or have a guy do it i feel absolutely nothing. And i dont even get aroused that much either.

But when im alone and i get a little aroused i still dont feel anything. Or im to ashamed to touch myself. Im trying to get myself to a sex therapist or something, but its so difficult to find one and my doctor isnt very helpful.

Idek what to do at this point, because im seeing this guy and i guess he expects us to have do sexual stuff, which i want! But i dont want to be put into the situation again where i feel nothing :/