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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Dry_Enthusiasm2661 on 2023-09-07 03:25:09.

My SIL is expecting her first baby at the end of this month. I have three kids. My youngest just turned one, so I have a lot of baby stuff (baby swing, clothes, toys, etc) that we don’t need anymore. Instead of donating them I thought it would be nice to let my SIL and her wife look at them before.

I brought them over and they picked out what they wanted/needed and my SIL immediately put it in the washing machine. I’m a very clean person, and all of the baby stuff was clean, so I confronted my SIL. I asked her why she needed to clean my stuff if it wasn’t dirty, and she knows I’m not dirty. My SIL said that she’s cleaning everything and named a long list of things she’s cleaning/cleaned for the baby (sterilized all bottles and pacifiers, washed all blankets, clothes, etc). I told my SIL that it’s pretty stupid to wash everything because what if she wants to take something back, and it’s not like cleaning everything in her house is going to make her prepared for her baby. Nothing prepares you for your first.

My SIL took this as me being mean, but I was trying to be helpful. She should enjoy her last few weeks of pregnancy instead of cleaning everything. My SIL’s wife told me that “we are allowed to do things differently with our children.” I pointed out to them that they’ve never had children, so she’s going to feel silly for doing. I also told them that when I was pregnant with my first I didn’t want to listen to anyone, and I regretted it later. They will too. My SIL made it seem like I was being an AH, but I don’t see it. AITA?