This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/TurbulentBody5161 on 2023-09-07 14:23:09.

I (29f) have been estranged from my sister Elizabeth (32f) for the last 8 years. Back when I was 21 I was engaged to my ex Frankie (30m) and I had just found out I was pregnant. I told Elizabeth because she was my big sister and we were there for each other. It had been a huge shock to me because I got pregnant while on birth control. Elizabeth acted slightly off when I told her and at the time I thought she was disappointed in me getting pregnant before finishing college. Days after I told her I was pregnant she told me she and Frankie had been together behind my back for three years of my five year relationship with him. Not only were they going behind my back like that but he had proposed to her and given her a family ring. She told me she wanted me to get an abortion and leave them to be together.

I miscarried around the time everything was coming out. I ended the engagement and Frankie moved in with Elizabeth. I did not speak to either of them again. My parents were torn between both of us. My grandma, who lives with my parents, had been firmly on my side. They said what Elizabeth had done was awful but she was still a good person. We all knew the kindness she had inside of her and how she had been a good big sister until she wasn’t. They respected that I did not want anything to do with Elizabeth when I was firm though and they did not try to change my mind.

8 years later and I’m happily married now and expecting a baby with my husband Gray. Elizabeth and Frankie did get married after and they have children together. My parents have grown very concerned over Elizabeth as a mother. Grandma said she’s very shallow and treats her kids like they’re accessories and cares little for them or their wellbeing. She just wants them to look good and wear the cute things she picks out. Grandma rolled her eyes telling me all this.

My parents are trying to intervene and protect Elizabeth’s kids. They have mentioned it to me twice. The last time I got some vibes from them that they might ask me to intervene as well. I decided to get ahead of their ask by telling them I am not going to get involved in helping them with Elizabeth’s kids. I said it felt like they were on the verge of asking and I wanted to save them the effort. My parents were stunned and questioned why I wouldn’t want to get to know my nieces. I said we might be blood related but that was as far as it would go given what their parents had done to me. I also told my parents I had no obligation to expose myself to Elizabeth again. And that it didn’t surprise me too much that someone who would betray their own sister that way and ask her to get an abortion so her own relationship with my ex would be easier, would be a shitty mom to her kids and would see them as accessories.

My parents said my attitude is too cold and since I have moved on and found happiness, I should find love for my nieces.

AITA?