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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/YeySharpies on 2023-09-07 08:40:10.

If you are insecure, have low self-esteem, etc. and struggle with it, people will tell you to learn to be confident in yourself and to raise your self worth by losing weight, wearing make-up, improving your grooming routine (different from hygiene), wearing a different style of clothing, or whatever other way they decide you’re currently less-than.

Here’s the kicker though…if you actually do those things or conquer your insecurities in any way, those same people will hate you even if you only ever cheered them on. If you are fat and don’t hate yourself but gain control of your health, women half your size will despise you. If you are smart and stop dumbing yourself down, men will feel threatened by you.

People who give you unsolicited “advice” on how to improve yourself aren’t trying to help you, they’re just trying to put you down. Be kind to most, but when someone else makes their insecurities your burden to carry, distance as much as you can from them because they would rather hold everyone else back instead of learning from others how to find their own security.

~Sincerely, a recovering doormat who turned shit around and has found her internal power (even if she lets others make her forget it sometimes).