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The original was posted on /r/exmormon by /u/throwawayforaithaq on 2025-10-06 16:34:47+00:00.

Just screaming out into the void at Oaks today, but also to those who haven’t deconstructed this part yet.

Women have always worked to provide an income. Their labor has always been undervalued or underpaid. It was only a few select upper class women that didn’t have to work to provide for an income.

Women sewed, took in laundry, provided childcare, and midwifery for centuries for an income. The textile industry prior to the industrial age existed because of women laboring over spinning wheels and looms. Hell, the word “spinster” came from the fact a respectable job for an unmarried woman was working a spinning wheel.

Lucy Mack Smith herself had a beer stand to provide for her family when her alcoholic husband couldn’t.

My “stay at home” mother sewed, ran a daycare, sold baked goods, sold at craft fairs, worked as a crossing guard at the school. She worked Christmas holidays at a bakery to bring in extra income. All the while she was providing full time care for 5 kids and 2 elderly in-laws AND being the relief society president for an ungodly amount of time (12 years!). I look back now and think of how hard and unrewarding it must have been. She’s now trying to cram a career in the few years before retirement because she found her dream job after the youngest kid left. She is smart, capable, and very successful in her field. Being a stay at home mom crushed her spirit. She has 3-5 mental breakdowns that I remember. She had no breaks because my dad worked two jobs to provide for us on top of finishing his degree. When he finished his degree, he got a high demand stake calling which meant even less time at home. My parents were exhausted and barely had the energy to deal with us let alone enjoy being parents. Had they had fewer of us kids they could have had a better life.

The world the Qo12 demands has never existed for the majority of the population. It is a fairytale for the rich.

https://www.campop.geog.cam.ac.uk/blog/2024/08/08/women-have-always-worked/