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The original was posted on /r/exmormon by /u/witwritdotblot on 2025-10-06 17:54:46+00:00.

I know the whole subreddit is full of different contradictions within Mormonism, but one I haven’t seen yet concerns the existence of intersex people.

As a TBM, I was able to doubt my doubts and rationalize any criticism of the church as propaganda sent by the Adversary. But I couldn’t move past the cognitive dissonance when I started asking questions about intersex people.

Let’s say you believe being queer and trans is a choice. Being intersex is not. It is just how you are born.

I’m not intersex myself, so I can’t really speak to their experience with the church or its members. But, I imagine there is quite a paradox. Intersex is not even indirectly referenced in the famproc. The church’s stance is that gender is binary and biological, but biologically, intersex people are not binary. There doesn’t seem to be a space for them or even a possibility that they could be married in the temple without committing some degree of either the “sin” of homosexuality or the “sin” of being transgender.

The more I thought about that concept, the more I realized how unjust it was! How stupid that anyone could be barred from the highest degree of glory based in the nature of their birth. Surely, that’s not what a loving Heavenly Father would want. …and then I learned about the church’s history with black people from other exmos and decided the whole institution was full of shit.

My point is this: I would have never questioned my faith if I didn’t seriously consider a question that no one in the church leadership had an answer to. All other questions could be “answered” by manipulation, deception, misinformation, and rhetoric. It took a literal paradox in church doctrine to get me to start thinking critically. Maybe, this is a question other people can ask themselves or another TBM.

Thank you, intersex people, for existing!