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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 on 2025-10-08 04:00:07+00:00.

Original Title: AITA For filing a police report on a good friend who was caught on video stealing my boyfriend’s camera at a dinner? She has refused to help me either replace it in full or contribute to the cost of replacing it.

I am NOT OOP. OOP is u/Zealousideal_Ear7529

Originally posted to r/AmItheAsshole

AITA For filing a police report on a good friend who was caught on video stealing my boyfriend’s camera at a dinner? She has refused to help me either replace it in full or contribute to the cost of replacing it.

Trigger Warnings: gaslighting

Mood Spoilers: infuriating

Original Post: September 17, 2025

More context:

We were out to dinner one night at an expensive hotel. My boyfriend let me borrow his Canon G7X (1800) camera to bring to take pictures with my friends. At the conclusion of the dinner, I went up to the room and realized the camera was gone. I went back right down to the table and no one had seen it.

I immediately got with hotel security and she is on video, clear as day, swiping the camera when my back was turned and shoving it in her purse. I covered for her initially with my friend, and contacted her to find a resolution. She had taken the camera with her and my other friends to a club after dinner, which I did not attend, and lost it there.

For background, this is my good college friend who I know well (the camera thief). She has been taken on free trips to Coachella and St Barths on my dime (not kidding), as well as many other things. We have done a lot together and are good friends, so I expected her to feel sorry.

Initially she lied, saying she did not have it. When I told her we had video, she confessed and then said yes she took it but lost it at the next bar she went to with my other friends. It is now gone. I asked her to help me replace it by going in on me with the cost. She has refused all measured or resolutions, and now I feel I have nothing left to do but file a police report and let them handle it. It is impacting my relationship, and I am furious my friend is not helping at all.

Why should I be on the hook for something she stole? I have given her three weeks to help me resolve this, but she insists she is going to do nothing. I am being pressed by my boyfriend to either replace the camera or help him file a report with her info and the footage. I even asked her to just throw in half or less than half the cost to help, but she still refuses. I do not want her to get in trouble, but I am at the point where I feel she really does not care.

Verdict: Asshole (Editor’s Note: the POO mode was amended for this post)

Relevant Comments

Commenter 1: YTA - Is there a reason you are choosing your thieving friend over your boyfriend? She’s made it clear she’s not your friend, and that she’s not going to make this right.

The police report should have been filed the moment she said she wasn’t going to pay for it.

If I were your boyfriend I would be reconsidering the relationship with you over this. You’re really dragging your feet to make this right. Get the report made and replace his camera.

OOP: This is how I am starting to feel. You are right and thank you for the honest words.

I just hate to get anyone in trouble, I think I may be the asshole because if I wanted to I could have paid out of pocket and resolved it for everyone

Commenter 2: YTA - not even sure why you are asking, I have rarely seen a post with more assholish behavior on here. You are an asshole to your BF, kind guy trusted you with something valuable and you are not even giving him all information you have after it got swiped. You brought your asshole friend to this dinner, you are an asshole for not filing a report, you are an asshole to yourself for not holding this fucking “friend” accountable… what the hell do you mean : “throwing in half” ? Get your head out off your ass and go file a report. Make sure your BF is made whole, be utterly embarrassed with your own behavior here, and do better next time.

OOP: I know. I just didn’t want to get her in trouble, I feel I could have paid for it myself and resolved for everyone. She is also in our friend group we have had forever and it will cause ripples

Commenter 3: I’d break up with you this tbh. Not wanting to cause ripples. You’re causing them in your relationship. Hopefully he leaves you after you keep showing you aren’t on his side.

OOP: I am a good boyfriend to him. We love each other. It is just a weakness in my character that I give people the benefit of the doubt. Clearly something I need to work on. I just really try to give people the beenfit of the doubt especially those I am close with

OOP clarifies on the location of the security cameras after realizing his BF’s camera was missing once OOP went up to his room

OOP: Wrong. I went up to my room where my BF was. He asked where his camera was. I went right down to the salon where we were eating and it was gone and no staff had seen it after clearing our table.

This is what prompted me to have security check the cameras, which they had in the dining room.

Commenter 4: Genuine question: are you a particularly insecure person? Don’t mean that as an insult. Asking because that’s the only way I could see someone trying to make amends with this “friend.” She’s not your friend. She’s using and taking advantage of you. And it sounds like she’s been doing so for a long time.

There are better people out there. You need to start respecting and treating yourself better. Otherwise your willingness to go out on a limb for the wrong people will jeopardize your relationships with the right people. I’m sure you can see how this can quickly turn into a self-destructive cycle.

Report her to the police and cut her out of your life like. And if you aren’t already, I’d talk to a therapist to better understand why you feel so compelled to protect this relationship.

Soft YTA to yourself and your boyfriend.

OOP: I agree with you, and this is an issue I do have. You are right here. I am a people pleaser at my own expense

Additional Information from OOP after reading comments

OOP: I feel guilty because I gave her time to fix it and she made me look like an idiot. I also feel guilty because I know if I could swing it right now I would have replaced it myself. I just cannot at this moment buy a 2k camera.

Editor’s note: all of the updates were made in comments, but also edited into the original post

Update #1: September 17, 2025 (same day, one hour later)

UPDATE: I sent her a text this AM telling her if I do not receive full cost of the camera or shipping confirmation of a new camera from an approved vendor to a provided address by end of day Friday, we will be filing a report with the police Saturday AM. I felt like an asshole typing this out to her, but I have to do it.

Relevant Comments

Commenter 1: Why would you even borrow this camera to begin with? A G7 X is a glorified point-and-shoot camera. At the cost of $1800. Why wouldn’t you just use your cell phone? I know this isn’t the point, but you borrowed something expensive and then lost it around people you cant trust and it wasn’t something you even needed to use.

OOP: Yes, you are right. In my defense, I borrowed it from the hotel room we were in to meet them at the hotel restaurant. I never intended to leave property with it. Boyfriend stayed in room upstairs when I went to meet friends. Thinking was take a few pics on it and bring it back upstairs when done.

Commenter 2: Wow, your update makes you even more of an AH! Just go to the police station and file a report! You are going to keep giving her line to hang you with.

Don’t be surprised when your bf dumps you after he is made whole for the cost of the camera.

OOP: I did that because I had a feeling it would be resolved if I made it clear action would be taken. One way or the other

Commenter 3: My take is that the friend stole the camera because she wanted it. Not “just to take a few extra pics” after OP went home, as she claimed.

She didn’t lose it, as she first claimed : IMO she still has it, even after all the drama that’s already happened. Police is what that girl deserves, and need.

OOP: This is starting to feel what it is. I do not know if you are familiar, but this camera even at full price is out of stock. Girls COVET it because it is known as the best “instagram camera”. I think she took it, and hoped I would replace it

OOP should be making this up to his boyfriend

OOP: Bought him some golden goose shoes, dinner, and some clothes :) I feel awful. I am glad this happened. I am done being used my friends.

Update #2: **September 17, 2025 (same day, three hours late…

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