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The original was posted on /r/antiwork by /u/Thickktwinkk on 2025-10-08 13:04:06+00:00.

Original Title: Why would a male coworker feel the need to defend what cofee he orders as it seems “too female choice” or another doesn’t want to admit pop star music he likes as it’s too femme. Do men really have such pressure on them to appear masculine?

So the make co worker said in WhatsApp chat “can I please get a latte wit a caramel shot” but pretend the order is for the other male co worker.

Then the other male co worker said what he wants and the manager replied “sure thing ladies”…

I know this is a joke but isn’t this rooted in sexism and misogyny. Why is a latte for women?!

As a gay man who is maybe a trans woman not sure yet but very feminine presenting gay man who has never fit into traditional gender roles I found this a bit odd like these are people in their 20s they are young.

I just thought that in 2025 there wouldn’t be such pressure on men to be so manly presenting.

The other co worker likes a certain female popstar who I also love but doesn’t want anyone to know as he says it’s not manly to like her. And when he told a female co worker she made fun of him…. Also he said he was enjoying hanging out with a male co worker at the gym and sent a photo on the WhatsApp group and a female co worker joked saying they should “get a room”!

What happens if one of these men are secretly gay and struggling with their sexuality? Why do people make so much fun of men if they are ever so slightly feminine or like things seen only ok for women??

And yet women can wet trousers to work men could never wear a skirt? If women like sports they are seen as cool!

I just think there is sooo much pressure on men in many ways and I’m worried as this is a small office my coworkers may be perpetuating stereotypes their parents enforced upon them for male and female roles.

Am I over reacting here or do I have a point?