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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/GolpeandoAszod on 2023-09-07 20:53:59.

I’m 22 and finishing my fourth year of college in the fall. My sister is 28 and recently got engaged with her boyfriend of 2 years and yesterday was her wedding.

For some context, I really don’t have a great relationship with my sister. Throughout my life she’s essentially taken it upon herself to try to be my third parent and have absolutely zero compassion for my boundaries, the way that I feel, the fact that I am on the spectrum, and what my opinions are, always insinuating that I will never be successful unless I “overcome my symptoms and be high functioning” and calling literally every objection, complaint, and every reaction for being backed into an emotional corner “abusive” pushing my buttons and then playing victim when I snap back. Worst part is my parents completely endorse this behaviour much to my detriment and I just want to cut them all off.

I originally did not want to go but my chad uncle would be there. Wanting to be gracious about it, I bought my sister a copy of BTS’s Proof anthology album as she’s a huge fan and was really happy about it.

However, later on during the reception, I had heard my sister telling her friends about the various times that I “abused” and called her nasty names in response to her “trying to talk sense” which really were just thinly veiled character assassinations, saying stuff like “you can’t tell him nothing” and “he’s just not a nice person”. I wasn’t even talking to her, and many of these I had previously apologised for.

I decided to stand up for myself and explain my side of the story, to which she was having none of, only doubling down on the rapid fire airing out of my dirty laundry whilst having the gall to complain about me “not taking accountability” and my “misremembered revisionist history”, I tried to stand up for myself and say that I was but she then cackled like a fucking hyena the moment I said that, and I really felt myself just getting mad, all the while she called me a narcissist, stuck-up, gaslighter, hypocrite, and a “ticking mistake bomb”.

Not wanting to play her little game, I just up and left, picking up that BTS album when she wasn’t looking. I don’t drive yet so I took the bus home, stopping by the store I had gotten the album from to return it, which they swiftly refunded. All the while I was being inundated with texts and calls that I just couldn’t be bothered to answer since I was so mad, only doing so after I had gotten home and calmed down. Not only was it my parents asking where I was, but also my sister and relatives calling me selfish and sensitive for taking back a “gift that was already given” due to “being petty and butthurt” and apparently it’s something that you don’t do, especially at a wedding; their words, not mine. To top it all off, my sister left a voicemail saying that I only “proved her point again.” I feel I really cannot reason with these people so am asking here.

TL;DR: Title.