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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/mjsmore33 on 2023-09-08 05:29:04.

My husband and I have a lot of mutual friends. It’s not unheard-of for some of the male friends to text me to ask a question or if we’re making group plans.

Twice in the past though guys have been inappropriate in one way or another. One guy would try to strike up a convo and I found it odd, but he never seemed flirty. That’s until he showed up unannounced when he knew I was home alone and tried to convince me to cheat. Another time a friend of my his knew he was out of town and text me to “check on me”. He kept asking if Iwas on, if i wanted him to come over if i felt safe. He made it seem as though my husband wanted him to do this. My husband did not ask him to text me and we suspect that the guy may have tried to use my fear as an excuse to come over. That was 14 and 10 years ago.

So jump to today. I randomly got a picture from our friend. Nothing sexual. It was just a bottle of alcohol and a countdown to his vacation. I told him “woo-hoo 2 more days, you guys are going to have so much fun on your trip”. He started asking what I’m doing, if I have plans for tomorrow night, and how long my husband will be out of town. Nothing uncommon or inappropriate.

I’ve hungout with this guy and his wife a few times without my husband. He is one of my husband’s best friends. He’s never once hit on me or made me feel uncomfortable. I couldn’t help but think back to those old texts from my husband’s former friends though. I started feeling really uneasy. I told him I had plans with a friend (the truth), and when my husband will be home. They work together so it would have been easy for him to find out if I lied.

I had no real reason to believe that he meant anything by it, but I can’t shake the feeling that it was not just a nice text. I want a female perspective. Am I over thinking things due to the past or is it weird?