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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Good_Sort7315 on 2023-09-08 04:49:09.

I recently got engaged to my fiancé after 2 years of dating, and told her we should probably start looking at houses. She told me that we didn’t have the money for a deposit on a mortgage, but I personally have a lot of money in savings. It’s a little bit more than $160,000.

My girlfriend was initially just shocked because it is a lot of money for a 24 year old to have saved (I’ve been extremely lucky in life). After a couple of days she began to be annoyed at me. She felt like I was hiding this from her.

I told her that I didn’t hide it from her, I was just raised to not talk about personal finances with anyone other than someone you’re married to, and I figured engaged is close enough that I’m happy to talk about it. I also said that I had actually used these saving to help her before (I’ve paid her rent a few times when she couldn’t and paid a couple thousand dollars for her dog to get surgery). She was still quite angry and has been giving me the silent treatment for the past day.

My parents don’t see the problem (duh), her parents understand my perspective but think I should have told her when we moved in together last year. None of our friends know because I don’t feel comfortable talking about it with them.

I’ve already asked her if we can talk about it when she’s ready and she just said she’d let me know when she was. I don’t think this is relationship ending, but I know she probably wants me to admit I was wrong. I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong. So I’m asking you guys more so out of curiosity for what others think.