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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Internal-Cricket-372 on 2025-10-31 08:57:38+00:00.

Obligatory this happened yesterday but I’m still dealing with the fallout.

So I (M27) work at a pretty small marketing firm in Portland. Like 20 people total, everyone knows everyone’s business. I’ve been dating my girlfriend Lex (F26) for about eight months and it’s going great.

Here’s where I fucked up. My best friend since college, Marcus (M28), just moved to Portland like three weeks ago. He’s crashing on our couch while he apartment hunts because rent here is insane. Normal stuff, right?

Yesterday morning I’m running late for work and I grab what I THINK is my lunch bag from the counter. Get to the office, settle in, 12:30 rolls around and I open the bag.

It’s not my lunch.

It’s a bag with a candle, some fancy chocolate, a card, and like… a silky eye mask thing? One of those sleep masks but nice. I pull out the card before my brain catches up and it says “Happy 3 Month Anniversary babe! Here’s to many more nights together - M”

My coworker Amy is walking by right as I’m reading it and goes “ooh what’s that?” and I panic and shove everything back in the bag but she definitely saw the card. Definitely saw the “M” signature.

Now here’s the thing. My girlfriend’s name is Lex. Which is short for Alexis. But everyone at work knows her as Lex. And they’ve met her twice at company events.

Thirty minutes later I’m in a meeting and I can feel people staring. After the meeting my boss pulls me aside - super casual, very Portland liberal vibe - and is like “hey man just want you to know we’re a very inclusive workplace, your relationship configuration is totally supported here.”

I’m like what.

Turns out Amy told everyone she saw an anniversary gift and card signed “M” and now everyone thinks Marcus is my… other partner? And that the three of us are together?

I tried explaining to my boss that Marcus is just my friend staying on our couch but I was flustered and I said “he’s only been with us for three weeks” which made it sound WORSE. My boss just nodded like “say no more” and walked away.

I texted Lex freaking out and she thought it was hilarious. Then she told me the bag was Marcus’s anniversary gift for his GIRLFRIEND who he’s been long distance with for three months. He left it on the counter because he’s mailing it to her today. I grabbed the wrong identical canvas tote bag.

Now I have to go back to work tomorrow and figure out how to un-convince twenty people that I’m in a polyamorous relationship. Marcus thinks this is the funniest thing that’s ever happened. Lex keeps calling him my “work boyfriend.”

My HR person sent me a very supportive email about domestic partner benefits.

TL;DR: Accidentally grabbed my friend’s anniversary gift bag for his girlfriend, coworker saw a card signed “M,” now my entire office thinks I’m in a throuple with my girlfriend and my male roommate.