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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/personelTrainer on 2023-09-09 06:05:35.

I love working out and am an avid gym goer. I minored in exercise science in college and worked as a personal trainer for 3 years. My girlfriend is not a fan of the gym or exercise. She doesn’t do much physical activity at all if she doesn’t have to. This is not a huge point of contention for us, however I feel that it would be a nice cute little shared interest for us if she would give it a long enough chance to see the fruits of her effort, but that’s neither here more there.

So recently we were getting ready for brunch with friends and she put on an outfit looked in the mirror told me she couldn’t wear it because she looked cubby. I told her I thought she looked fine but if she’s more comfortable in something else, cool. This happened like 3 more times before we left for brunch. On the ride there, she told me t that she’s ordering whatever I got since it’ll be a healthier food.

A pattern of this behavior persisted for about an entire week before I thought it was getting concerning and asked her about it. She told me that she hasn’t been feeling great about her weight. She said that she got too big for multiple things in her closet the last year. So she weighed herself and saw that she was went up from 130lbs to around 160 so she’s been feeling fat.

I told her that she’s not fat and I think her body is great the way it is. She said that she needs to figure something out. So I got a bit excited. I thought this meant that she was now looking for solutions to her weight gain. That evening I spent about 6 hours designing a safe healthy fitness regimen and diet for her to follow for the next 90 days.

I thought back at all the things she doesn’t like about her body and thought about what would be helpful to that part of her body. Ex: she is very insecure about the size of her butt. She of course wants to have a bubble butt like all the sexy TikTok gym girls have. I made the perfect exercise regimen for her to follow.

I also decided to find a ton of macro friendly recipes and make a recipe book for her. Including Like I said this was over 6 hours of work perfecting this for her. This was a labor of love and I thought it’d be a great gift for her.

So the next day I ask her to come over to my laptop and pull it up for her. I told her that I know how she’s bothered by her weight gain, so I made this for her. I explained everything to her and told her that it’s something we can do together and I was excited to help her with it.

She was NOT happy. She went from disgust, to anger to tears. She cried and told me that I was such a huge asshole for this. She told me that if I felt the need to do all of this that obviously I didn’t like her body and wanted her to change. I tried to comfort her and tell her that wasn’t the case and I made it because she wanted to lose weight but she wasn’t hearing it. I genuinely don’t get how what I did was wrong when I was doing my best to help.

AITA?