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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/BookishJane08 on 2023-09-10 18:29:45.

A week ago I asked my daughter (8) to quickly watch her brother (10 months) while I picked up some things I had been working on during his nap. She rarely gets asked to watch him as I feel that he is my job not hers. Hubby came home and saw that she was watching baby and went off on me about how I was irresponsible, accidents happen quickly and she wouldn’t know what to do in a chocking event.

These are all reasonable fears so I made the neccisary changes to ensure I am there to watch him at all times.

Today (Sunday) I asked him to watch baby as I started baking a large order. I came in to the room and noticed he was alone watching Tv. I asked him where baby was and he replied that our daughter was watching him in her bedroom.

Her bedroom is on the opposite side of the house, and with the tv blaring you could definately NOT hear what was going on in her room. I pointed out to him how he yelled at me last week for the same thing and he replied “That was different” When asked how, he replied “she wants to look after him, she came to ask me if she could”

I was so mad. I didn’t leave them alone for prolonged periods of time, I was litterally in and out of the room during all of that time as I was cleaning up, but that was neglectful and dangerous because I asked her to watch baby. While at the same time it is perfectly ok for her to be left, completely alone, rooms away, with the tv on, because she asked to watch him so somehow that would mean that she pays closer attention to him? Like accidents Don’t happen when you choose to look after a baby?

He is now mad at me, saying I am overreacting and that I am still in the wrong while he is not.

I accept that I was wrong in asking her to watch him, but am I wrong for being mad about the double standards???