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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/aurora-borealis on 2023-09-11 00:04:50.

I went to school with her so have known her for a long time. We’re by no means close, but follow each other on social media.

After the traumatic birth of her first daughter, she quit her job and did a 6 week course to become a doula. She then declared that the medical establishment are deliberately harming pregnant women.

When she got pregnant again, she announced that she was foregoing all prenatal care. Apart from peeing on a stick, she did nothing else. No blood tests. No ultrasounds. She put a post on Instagram saying that “sometimes death is inevitable”.

She miscarried.

Then she got pregnant again. Somehow she doubled-down, and documented the whole thing publicly. My friends and I watched on with a mixture of disbelief and horror as she continued to renounce medical care.

I have consistently seen her declare that:

  • birth is unequivocally safe without any medical help/intervention
  • only a TINY minority of women face true complications
  • if ‘I can free birth, any woman can do it’
  • that you ‘have the birth you imagine you will’.

After her last post I’d fucking had enough. I’ve had friends grapple with multiple miscarriages. Baby loss. Traumatic births requiring life-saving interventions. Was my friend whose baby got stuck manifesting that? Should she just have just breathed differently and lit some more fucking sage?

The arrogance is staggering. I challenged her in the comments of her post. I pointed out that if her theories about birth being safe were true, why are infant/maternal mortality rates in countries like Sierra Leone so high? They have limited access to parental care, lack of birth professionals, etc. Surely we should see all those women breezing through birth?

It’s a sickening echo chamber that puts all the pressure and responsibility on women to have a ‘perfect’ birth. Any negative outcome, in her opinion, is a direct result in ‘not believing’ you can do it.

She successfully free-birthed a healthy baby earlier in the year, which has solidifed her position. She is saturated in other like-minded accounts. When I asked if she’d like to have a video discussion for her (highly public) Instagram, she declined. I was absolutely ready to challenge her positions.

I completely accept that many women have unnecessary medical interventions. I don’t deny there are systemic problems within medicine relating to pregnancy and birth. But to spread misinformation does a complete disservice to vulnerable women who might not know any better. Who might find themselves in those echo chambers. Who might ignore symptoms that need serious medical intervention.

I want to do something about it, but I don’t know how. I know it’s her page and I don’t have to follow her, but I feel a sense of duty to other women who might fall for this shit.

Also: she’s now also selling Monat hair shampoo and trying to convince everyone to either buy it from her/join her downline.

Any thoughts?