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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/_HotMessExpress1 on 2023-09-11 00:29:22.

Ever since I was a kid I’ve always been masculatized by grown men of my own race and I’m sick of it. It’s so dehumanizing. I’ve dealt with the same pattern as a kid. Some grown black man acting like I’m the same size and gender as he is when Im clearly a woman, they threaten me because I’m not kissing their ass or put their hands on me, and if they ever get confronted on the matter by someone else they’ll lie and say I made them do it because I was starting drama with them first even though I don’t even say anything to these men most of the time. I’m visibly black, darkskinned with kinky hair…I don’t use the hair typing system anymore because I feel like it promotes colorism and racism. I feel like that makes matters worse because it seems like it gives colorist black men the green light to be rude as possible to me.

I got tormented by a black male teacher when I was in high school and no one helped me. He hated me for whatever reason and when I got older and started going to practice after school hours he would come up with reasons to torment me. He would call me out in front of everyone, he pushed me, he made up some reason one day to throw everyone’s stuff on the floor except his favorite ones and indirectly said it was my fault.

A few days ago this black homeless man with barely any teeth acted like he wanted to fight me because my trash bag had a hole in it and I didn’t realize. I live in homeless shelter and im just waiting to be placed into a permanent home. For whatever reason he was helping the maintaince people take out the trash so he saw my bag leaking, i apologized and was literally about to clean my mess up until he started making passive aggressive insults.

When I defended myself he stood by the door trying to scare me…I called him a fucking idiot and started walking away. He said as I was walking away," say that again. I was in the army for x amount of years." I cursed him out and said he wasn’t going to do shit because he would’ve done it already. I had mace in my pocket but the fact that he was trying to scare me and thought it was a good look for him to try to scare a black woman is insane. I came back out with my mom and she said," stop talking to my daughter crazy." He said he never said anything to me and that i started bothering him out of nowhere…i started screaming and making a scene, then he walked to his room saying he was going to get his sister to beat our asses.

Before anyone in here comments that this is a poor person issue I’ve experienced this similar situation while being in middle class areas the school I went to where the black male teacher was tormenting me was in a middle class area. And I already have a feeling someone is going to say that poor areas have a high rate of violence so I should be expecting this…I have not seen any fight that broke in since I’ve been in a homeless shelter, and before someone else tells me I need to leave I know I’m leaving I’m just waiting to get permanently placed somewhere else. This wasn’t about being in a poor area he was just very eager to do it because I’m a black woman. After that he came out to smile at the hispanic women in the hallway. After that I wanted to cry not because I was scared of him but because I’m I’m sick of being treated this way.

No matter what I’ve worn I’m always been treated like a man from men my own race. I was more girly when I was in school and still got pushed and hit by black boys. They would try and justify it somehow all of the time while always leaving the hispanic or more exotic looking girls alone. I used to be all for black empowerment but honestly I’m not anymore. I’m sick of defending black men and boys but they turn around and want to try to break me down and treat me like shit. I’ve never experienced so much hatred from another group of men…even when I dealt with racist white men they have never tried to act like they were going to hit me.

I’m sick of it…I’m so uncomfortable around my own race of men because of all the stuff they’ve done and tried to justify doing. I had gotten some help from a few black men but I’ve gotten way more hostility and anger from them as a collective. And every time a black man acts like he wants to hit me and I’m around other black men they just all stare and don’t do shit about it, but later want to talk about being protecters and providers. I told my ex about it and he hasnt said anything (he’s black) ,I asked if he was even going to ask if I was okay…no response. He’s been texting me obviously wanting to have sex but you can’t even pretend to care?

I hope I’m allowed to post this here. I don’t really know if I’m allowed because there’s other races of women here. I hope this doesn’t come across as hate speech. I just feel like misgynoir and violence against women within the black race isn’t talked about enough even with these youtube channels I feel like these things aren’t getting enough coverage or people just write us off as being bitter. And yes I got referred to a psycharist, but for anxiety. I’m scared of having ptsd on my record but I do think I may have it…I still think about the teacher that bullied me and it happened over 6 years ago.