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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Maleficent-Tie-4185 on 2023-09-15 01:16:37.

this is a bit of an existential question but i’m honestly struggling a lot in life right now because I feel very “directionless”, even when everything is objectively going well.

i’m 27-post college, I put a lot of focus and effort into my career, and i’m finally at a place where I am happy in my career.

but when it comes to everything about my personal life I couldn’t be more lost. my Bf and I have been together 6 years.

marriage is totally up in the air. i always thought i might like to get married but hadn’t put a ton of thought into it - thought it would just happen naturally. i’m recently finding that my bf has some reservations about marriage in general and i agree with some of them, such as marriage being outdated and really just a piece of paper

kids i’m even more on the fence about, i’m an only child and don’t have strong relationship with my biological family so part of me wants a family, kids to watch grow and spend time with when i am older. another part of me is afraid and turned off by the idea of losing my independence, being unable to handle an infant(mentally mostly) and the entire process of pregnancy really just scares me and doesn’t excite me in the slightest

it seems like the women around me who are my age know exactly what they want, they’re actively planning to have kids or have them already (or know they never want kids and are firm with that) are getting engaged and married in what seems to be an effortless and obvious decision

so i want to know what’s wrong with me? is it normal to be in your late 20s with stable job and relationship but no idea where the ship is headed? and for women who are married or have kids, what made you sure about your decision?