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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Tuna_Sub23 on 2023-09-16 21:07:56.

First off, sorry for formatting as I’m on mobile.

So a little backstory before we get to the main issue, my fiancé (F 29) and I (M 34) have been engaged for a little over 2 years and are getting married next month. Combined we make about 170k a year. We decided on a place that is perfect for us to get married at and never expected anyone to help because, 1 we chose a place that fits our budget and 2, it’s ultimately our day and what we want so we planned on paying for it ourselves. Now my fiancés parents make more then my family does.

My fiancés parents offered to help in any way they can and have paid for stuff without us even asking. They paid for our bridal shower, which included the gifts, the food, and the rental spot. They also paid for her dress which was about 1k. My parents volunteered to pay for the rehearsal dinner and the dessert. We chose a place for the dessert and gave my parents a price. We chose to do cupcakes and just a little 2 tier cake from a popular bakery called everything bundt cakes. Well when we went to place the order we found out the “bundtinis” are really small and decided maybe we should double the order. I called my mom and she confirmed it was ok even though the price was doubled. I asked her if she was sure because they were planning a trip to Mexico at the time and my dad was working a second job to be able to afford it. I told my mom I don’t care if she wanted to do something else because of the price change but she reassured me it was fine. So we placed the order and thought that was that.

Now on to the issue, a few days after we placed our order I get a text from my sister saying we need to talk. So I texted back asking what was up. She goes on this huge rant saying I need to stick up for my parents because they work so hard for what they have and me deciding to double the dessert order what’s bullshit. I tried explaining to her that our parents agreed to it and reassured me it was fine. It wasn’t like I told my parents this is what we are doing and you don’t have a choice. My sister started calling my fiancé a cry baby and me and ungrateful bitch. I told her if she kept it up she will be uninvited to our wedding because I will not put up with the way she is talking to us. She said fine take me out because I’m done with you and you won’t see your niece ever again. There was a lot more choice words that were said that I won’t get in to but my fiancé was upset and crying and I won’t stand for that. I have completely cut my sister off and have not talked to her since. I didn’t have a conversation with my dad and a lot of tears were shed between us. I haven’t talked to my mom because she makes excuse after excuse for my sister as to why she acts the way she does. I have also went low contact with her because I don’t wanna start any more drama.

So I ask if I’m the asshole for going NC with my sister even though she’s family?

Edit: I guess I should clarify that my dad DID NOT pick up a second job just for this wedding. He’s been working a second job for a while now on the weekends just for extra money for anything he wants to do. My mom is a home body and her number 1 excuse for not doing anything is money. They did end up going on vacation and had a wonderful time, but my dad uses this money for baseball games, high end whiskey he likes to drink, gas for his motorcycle rides. Stuff like that

Edit #2 a lot of you are saying my dad took a second job to make ends meet which isn’t the case. He’s had a second job on the weekends driving a limo for extra money period. He didn’t take a second job to pay for desserts for a wedding.

Edit #3 and may be my final edit. I offered to pay the difference of the dessert or pay for the rehearsal dinner they also offered to pay for to offset the cost. The desserts we chose were the cheapest option we found that didn’t include a professional baker. I’ve also told my parents I don’t care about the money but they, once again, reassured me it was fine after a lengthy phone call.