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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Federal-Resolve5292 on 2023-09-17 15:28:35.


So I’ve been married to my husband for 3 years. I have a 22 years old daughter from a previous marriage but she moved out and my husband has a daughter too who’s 19 years old let’s call her Juliet and she also has a child. She got pregnant when she was 17 and her child is now 2 years old. She used to live with her mother in a different state when she was in high school but now moved to our state for university.

Now this is a problem because her mother won’t move with her and the Juliet will have to attend University now this child cannot be left alone while she is attending her stuff and also studying. My husband said he’ll rent her a place on his part but during mornings and afternoons I baby sit the child and when Juliet finishes her classes she’ll pass by and take the kid. I said no I am not in the mental state to handle a child.

I work but from home mostly as I own a business that I organize and might go to the company 2 days a week or something so my life could be described as the “peaceful life” as I am my own boss and despite having commitments I am mostly in control but I didn’t achieve that for free. I worked my ass off in the past just to achieve this life. Having to take care of a child will disturb all of that and I know better how draining children are as much as I love my daughter I went through hell back then. No I do not regret having my daughter, back then I was young and wanted to have her but I am not going to overlook the disastrous aspects of being around children and I really don’t wanna relive that again because my stepdaughter Juliet decided to have unprotected sex yet wants to live her life while I get to handle her problems so she would shine.

My husband goes to work so he can’t handle the child and asks me to do it because I don’t go outside all the times but I told him no not my problem this won’t be good for me or the child. He proceeded to call me selfish and told me “what if it was your daughter“ I simply told him that asking me this puts him in bad light because yes I will handle my daughter’s problems because I am her parent. He is Juliet’s parent yet he is deflecting the responsibility on me. Her mother too is getting herself out of the picture. I never throw my daughter’s problems on him.

I also told him he could get her a nanny or put the kid in on of those nurseries but he refused saying that’s too much money when he is already paying her rent and tuition. Yesterday I straight told him that he and her mother should try to solve this situation and leave me out of the equation because I am not gonna help and that Juliet is not an orphan she has both her parents living them 3 should solve this out without trying to drop the whole thing on me and they live their lives to the fullest.