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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/Zealousideal-Sell137 on 2023-09-19 13:38:35.
I rarely talk about my life with my friends from college. But I can’t help but feel like they’re never happy for me and only like me when things aren’t going great in my life.
Like we’re all in a group chat of 7 of us, all girls. We were all super close in college, we have met up several times over the years, we tried for at least once year, but have only had the chance once since covid.
I feel like everytime I share bad news, they’re my friends, but if I really need them, they’re not.
My grandmother died this weekend. It broke me a lot. She knew all my friends because my grandma lived close to our college and a few times she drove down to see me.
I shared the news on our chat on Sunday, I shared how sad I was, I posted a pic of the funeral date announcement.
5 of them put a sad face reaction, 1 one them said she’s sorry and some generic condolences message. Only one other, messaged me privately and asked how I was doing.
Is it wrong to feel like they should have engaged with me more? Asked me how I was doing, I’m not expecting them to come to the funeral, but at least message me about it.
They knew I was very close to her.
Yet, 2 or 3 weeks ago when one of them got divorced and moved into a new apartment, so many questions and discussions about the apartment.
I’ve noticed a lot of them being cold to me since I got a great a job in NYC 4 years ago.
It hurts that people do this.
They only seek to be my friend when it’s relationship drama or gossip, otherwise they don’t care.
One of this friends in this group, experienced the death of her brother in law 3 years ago in a car crash. I sent flowers to her house, called her and even had call her with her sister who was devastated.
I know I’m ranting, and I should just realise they aren’t good people.
BUT, they were and are good friends to me before I got this job.
I know they’re jealous, one of them told me out right that she thinks I’m making a mistake moving to London for this job etc.
I know it’s also partially human nature, they might feel inferior etc, but what can I do? I don’t boast, we all talk about jobs and career sometimes. I never try to bring them down, only uplift them.
Sad :(