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The original was posted on /r/transeducate by /u/smisipower on 2023-07-17 11:24:39.

My mom is a very kind and loving person usually. She had good relations with my boyfriend when he was in the closet. But ever since he came out to her, she is not so subtly distancing herself from him, hinting she wished we broke up. In the first couple of weeks she was openly transphobic, saying she believes it is a mental disorder he needs to figure out. When I explained how hurtful she is being, she dialed down her rhetoric, saying she doesn’t care how he lives his life, but that she’s worried he is “feminizing me” and confusing me. It came to a point they are both scared of being together.

My mother is a practising psychoanalyst, with a classical Freudian education, and I can’t shake the feeling this world view fuels her transphobia. My dad, for contrast, has similar background but he had much easier time excepting my boyfriend’s gender.

Does anybody has advice on how to help my mother be better with my boyfriend? Relatedly, does anyone had a recommendation for an introductory book for psychologists about trans issues?