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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/riverthenerd on 2023-09-22 17:06:49.

I’m 24 and a nonbinary afab. I have had a scoliosis diagnosis since middle school. I’ve tried bracing and multiple rounds of PT. Hell, my parents were even desperate enough to take me to a chiropractor. Nothing worked but the brace, which just slows progression but doesn’t reverse anything. Last year I had a 5 year follow up X-ray and I was told I had 2 32° curves. The orthopedist literally said he could do nothing and that I will just become disabled when I’m older. This year I saw a rheumatologist for widespread joint pain/hypermobility and he did a spine X-ray to see if my scoliosis was causing at least the hip pain. He put my scoliosis at moderate-to-severe. He ordered a lumbar MRI, which revealed I had herniated discs, bulging discs, and osteoarthritis. And that’s just my lumbar. Who knows what I’ve got going on in the other parts of my spine where i have equally terrible pain. And because I have curves under 45° i can’t get surgery due to “liability concerns”. Doesn’t matter how horribly I’m suffering or how poorly the conservative treatments work.

The pain is so bad that I get stomachaches from the amount of ibuprofen i take. And I combine the ibuprofen with Tylenol Arthritis (max otc strength) and lidocaine patches, but nothing changes. Some days I stay in bed. I also have chronic leg pain that occurs with the back pain that feels like my legs are being crushed. Leg pain that’s so mind numbingly severe that sometimes I need someone to stay with me so I don’t do anything insane to escape the pain. Like I literally lose my mind from experiencing pure agony beyond my comprehension.

Today i saw a man with a VERY mild case of scoliosis say he was “finally” offered surgery after being diagnosed for TWO YEARS. He posted his xray and it was so mild that at first glance it looks normal. He said that because he was having nerve pain his doctors offered spinal fusion. When people asked if the surgery was really for his scoliosis since it was almost too mild for a scoliosis diagnosis, he said “yes that’s what they told me”. He’s getting several vertebrae fused to straighten out his slightly imperfect spine. ITS NOT FUCKING FAIR. WHY DO I HAVE TO SUFFER FOR YEARS AND WATCH MY SPINE FALL APART WHILE MEN GET CURED WHEN THEY START HAVING TOO MUCH PAIN? I have never felt so enraged. Men can literally just waltz into a doctors office and ask for major spinal surgery with several potential complications and get told yes because it’s their body their choice, but I could kick and scream for even something as small as a lidocaine 5% prescription and they would probably call me dramatic and tell me to try a 5th round of PT. I don’t know why suffering is expected for us. Good for him for getting relief, but why can’t I have that kind of relief too when I have it so much worse and for so much longer?