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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Jaded_jeep on 2023-09-23 18:21:45.

My husband & I talked about daycare & how our schedules would work since we both work full time. It was agreed that his parents would babysit mon-sat & my parents would babysit Sundays, when needed. Of course his mom was thrilled to be the main care taker (she retired purposely for this). I ended up having a very complicated pregnancy where my daughter had to be born 3 months early. She was in the NICU for 6 months. I had to go back to work after 8 weeks & saved the rest of my time for when she was discharged. It was rough to say the least.

Once she was discharged, all she kept talking about was how she couldn’t wait to babysit & that her “playroom” was ready for her & if I ever needed to run errands I could leave my daughter with her. But I’m the type of parent who isn’t bothered by bringing my baby anywhere unless it’s prohibited / dangerous. This was me & my husbands time as a family to bond together.

To make a long story short, my entire leave she would not stop harassing us to have a conversation about expectations when she’s babysitting. If we’re picky about diapers, a sleep schedule etc. I told him I felt like she’s just rushing us back to work & I didn’t appreciate it. I told my husband I’m honestly not that picky. I will provide her with everything she will need & that she’d only be watching her for 2-3 hrs a day anyway (we have opposite work schedules). My only main concerns were that I did not want her giving my daughter ANY medication (she’s already on meds) & that I don’t want her driving her anywhere.

So this is where I’m questioning AITA… IMO, she’s just too young to do anything or go anywhere (her adjusted age is 5 months old) & something we both agree on is that my MIL is a horrible driver. Not that she’s a reckless driver, but the opposite. She’s such an overly cautious driver that she causes other cars to stop short or she gets honked at all the time & cut off. She’s the driver in the left hand lane going 45 MPH on the highway. We just honestly don’t feel safe with her driving anywhere especially if it’s not needed. She just wants to take her out to show her off & have “play dates” with the other family babies (I’ve heard her trying to set up these playdates & stopped her once telling her she won’t be provided with a car seat) Well my husband ended up going to talk to her without me & pretty much the conversation went sour. She did not like being told that she can’t “ever leave the house” he reminded her that she’s only baby sitting for 2-3 hrs, 2-3x/week. He really fought for this, to the point where she said something along the lines of “I’m providing you with free daycare, I’ll take her where ever I want or you’re going to have to find someone else.” My MIL was so eager to babysit & now wants to play this power card of “I’ll do what I want since I’m not charging you” attitude.

AITA for my only demand to be not to take my baby out of the house even though I’m getting free daycare?