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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/airwo701 on 2023-09-23 18:50:37.

My husband (37M) and I (37F) have 4 kids (16F, 15M, 13F, and 13M). Our twins are in the 8th grade. Our son, Bayard and our daughter, Addilyn.

On Monday, my husband and I both got texts from Bayard that he needed to talk to us when we got home. We found this odd and were talking to each other before the kids got home. Once they were home, we spoke to Bayard in his room. He told us that he had heard that Addilyn was being rude to her History teacher, this teacher also has Bayard in a different period. The teacher is also Bayard’s baseball coach. Bayard and his friends look up to her, she knows so much about the sport and will talk to them about all the games going on, and she also gives them advice on things. My husband and I have never seen Bayard that mad, he was red in the face. He said he didn’t know much of the specific details, but he heard from some kids that Addilyn asked the teacher if she was on her period.

We emailed the teacher and got a reply on Tuesday, she admitted everything Bayard said was true and gave us some of the details. What she said was absolutely horrifying, she said it started when Addilyn was talking to some friends while she was trying to instruct the class, when she told her to stop, Addilyn refused. The kids were learning about Thomas Jefferson and one of the kids asked if he was autistic, as the kid had read it somewhere. Addilyn and her friends then made some joke about autistic people, who basically called them stupid.

One of the kids on the baseball team and Bayard’s friend, is autistic, and Addilyn is very aware of that. He is a really bright and sweet kid. The teacher told her that wasn’t very nice and tried to educate them a bit on what autism was, this is when Addilyn said that the teacher was “overreacting” and asked her if she was on her period.

The teacher admitted she didn’t call because she has had bad experiences with these types of phone calls in the past and was afraid of how’d we react, we told her she didn’t need to worry.

After this, my husband and I talked and agreed that Addilyn would lose her phone for at least a few weeks and she needed to write an apology letter both to her teacher and to the boy she made fun of, even though he wasn’t in that period of her class.

Addilyn wrote an apology letter to both but they seemed insincere and potentially AI generated, and when asked about it, she admitted she used AI to write it. We told her it needs to be genuine but she’s refusing to write a letter. She’s saying “forcing” her to write an apology is going against her right to express her true thoughts, and is calling us named, including a-holes. AITA?