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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwaway93028374 on 2023-09-23 19:22:40.

I have a group of friends I haven’t seen in a long time as we are all older now (mid-50s) and most have scattered around the country. We decided to put together a girls’ vacation. Once we agreed on dates and a location, we started looking for places to stay. We all talked about what we wanted (type of location, budget, etc), and I was adamant that I did NOT want to stay at an airbnb. There are many many reasons I did not want to, but one of the reasons I listed was that I do not go on vacation so that I can do chores, and in this case in particular, I was also going to have to leave early in the morning for my flight home because I had a training meeting at work that I needed to be home in time for.

After much discussion, the rest of the group said sorry, in order to meet the rest of the requests and stay in budget for everyone, an airbnb is the only option. I suggested that I could stay at a nearby hotel and just meet up with them during the day, but apparently that was going to screw up the budget for other folks. They told me that since I hated the chore side of things, they could take care of all of the chores. I didn’t want to be a jerk about it so I said that I would be willing to put my linens somewhere (washing machine, laundry pile, whatever) and that I would stay on top of washing any cups/dishes/etc that I used. They all assured me this was plenty and would be no problem for them to do whatever else needed to be done.

The vacation itself was lovely, we had a lot of fun and laughs, and it was great to hang out. I did not read the check out cleaning rules because I knew it would piss me off, but I asked what the expectation was for our linens, and one of the ladies said we had to start a load of laundry so I could put my linens in the washer.

I kept my dishes/utensils washed and clean throughout, and I put my linens in the washer on the final morning and headed to the airport when everyone else was just getting up. I also only threw garbage into the shared kitchen garbage since I know many places ask you to take out the garbage.

I thought all was well, but this morning I had coffee with my best friend, and when I brought up how great I thought things went on the trip, she got a little awkward, and eventually told me that everyone else was angry at me after I left. I guess there was a lot on the cleaning list and everyone was stressed about getting stuff done before the checkout and their own flights home, and they felt I should have helped with the chores since I was up early. My best friend, bless her, reminded them that they had all agreed that I didn’t need to do any chores and I had taken care of what I said I would, but apparently they said that “no reasonable person” would think it was OK and it was very selfish and rude of me to just leave. I’ve already decided that if there’s another trip I won’t be going unless we’re at a hotel, but I’d still like to know, AITA?