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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/cherrymerrywriter on 2023-09-25 00:27:27.

For years, I always enjoyed how moderate makeup made my face look more alive (I wear foundation, blush, mascara, and sometimes peachy/terracotta liquid lipstick). I knew that it made me more attractive to men, and I knew that it increased the chances of me being sexualized. But, most of the time, I either didn’t care or liked it. After going through some things, I became more sensitive to being sexualized.

First, I stopped wearing dresses/skirts shorter than my knees. Now, this year, nearly every time I make eye contact with a man, I become hyperaware of the makeup on my face, and of the fact that by wearing it, I’m supporting the increased chance that I’ll be sexualized.

It feels like this: if I know a certain outcome will occur with an action, and I take that action, I become partially responsible for the outcome. The truth is: I don’t want men to sexualize me. But it’s also true that people treat you better when you’re ‘pretty.’ But when I don’t wear makeup, it’s like I lose value. People aren’t mean to me, but they’re not as nice either.

I honestly don’t know what to do. Is there an in-between? I’ve tried only wearing foundation and blush, but even that made me feel cheap.