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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Sky_C_1503 on 2023-09-27 08:52:43.

First of all I wanna say English is not my mother tongue so I apologize por any mistakes you might find in this post.

Now I (20f) was born and raised in latin america. I got the opportunity to travel to the US to learn English, I’m currently residing in Oregon and I’m a few months away from going back to my country. I started dating Josh (20m) some months ago, it has been really fun and he wanted me to experience more of his culture before I left so last week he invited me over to his parents’ house for a bbq and to watch an american football game (his family is crazy about this sport).

He was specially excited for me to meet his brother’s wife Carla (30ishf), he told me Carla had cuban ancestry and was really proud of it, he even showed me her social media and her username was like Cubanmom1, she had numerious tiktoks about being a latino in the us and basically everything in her feed revolved around her being cuban. He also told me she says she misses living in miami as the latino comunity is bigger there.

So when the day came I went to greet his brother and carla and I started to speak to her in spanish, nothing crazy I just introduced myself. She didn’t answer straight away and just stared at me, I got nervous and kept babbling in spanish until she said “excuse me” and ran off to the bathroom, her husband followed her and I was left there standing with josh and their kids. It was a bit akward since josh parents were watching us and expected Carla to be thrilled to meet me but no one said anything and we just carried on. They kept their distance from us the rest of the evening and when josh was about to take me home his brother asked pulled us aside and asked me to apologize to Carla for “making stupid assumptions about her and for trying to make her look like and idiot in front of his folks”. Apparently Carla is not fluent in spanish and only knows some words. I really didn’t think it was that big of deal and said “I’m sorry it was an honest mistake, I saw most of your social media is based off on you being Cuban, I assumed you’d know the language”. Her husband got super mad and started to raise his voice, demanding I give a better apology, Josh just dragged me out before we could make an ever bigger scene and since then both Carla and his brother had been complaining to him and his parents for my behaviour, saying I was out of line and need to apologize properly. His parents are staying out of it, Josh is on my side and has told me multiple times I have nothing to apologize for. I also don’t think I did anything wrong but they decided this is a hill to die on.