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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/caulfieldly on 2023-09-27 19:14:55.

Why is it so hard to be a woman / uterus-bearer?

I had the Paragard IUD (copper, non-hormonal) for a few years and absolutely loved it. I tend to respond very negatively to hormonal birth control, and Paragard freed me from that and more.

Well, I just had to have it taken out today because – newsflash – it became dislodged over time. I was developing a progressively worse infection, and my body was beginning to reject it. I had to take an ambulance over the most excruciating pain I’ve ever had, and still experienced all the worst parts of treatment for gyno-related troubles. I almost broke into tears when the doctor who saw me for removal treated me with more understanding that I’ve experienced previously in a medical setting.

I’m struggling trying to assess BC options, because I feel like I’ve run out of anything non-hormonal and practical. I loved the IUD for so long, but after this experience I’m afraid of complications happening again. What I went through could have led to serious damage if I wasn’t able to catch it early. I just want to live a normal life and let my body regulate itself as it needs. It feels like there is so much pressure on the woman to alter herself physically for the sake of intimacy and none of the attention on men.

I feel exhausted. My husband is so sweet, understanding, and comforting, but I could hear the (subtle) sadness in his voice when I mentioned condoms again. I wish I could hand off all the side-effects to him, at least for a year, and be like, “Here! Now’s your turn!”