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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Basic_Sun_2401 on 2023-09-27 18:44:55.

My brother in law got married recently and my mother in law came to the city for the wedding (she lives in another state), and it’s staying with me (29f) and my husband (32m) in our apartment for a while.

We don’t have any problems with her, she respecsts our individual routines and helps with the house. The thing that resulted in a discussion was our food, or in her words, the lack of. We have pre-prepared meals for the week and we keep only stuff like ceral, fruits and snacks stored. She is used to prepare fresh meals everyday for herself and was really worried for our diet when she found out we don’t cook everyday.

I told her we keep in check what we eat and we take time to exercise together during the week, but she insisted that fresh meals are better so she started to make them. The thing is, she also wanted to go out, know the city, visit friends, so she started to ask my husband to cook for us. I told him it wasn’t necessary, but his mother insisted and now he is cooking 3 meals for him and his mom everyday. He works from home so it’s not the worst thing, but he had to stop with his hobbies like playing video games and volleyball so that he had time for his mom.

I started to go out with my friends after work so that I don’t have to prepare dinner for them, because I knew that if I was in the house she would ask me to. My husband asked why I’m getting home late and I told him. He wasn’t happy. He said that it’s unfair that I’m getting to do something I enjoy while he has to be his mom personal cheff. I told him that he could just not do it and tell his mom that he is uncomfortable with the situation, but he said I’m being an asshole to them because cooking once a day for his mom should not be that much of a problem. I still think that having to prepare an entire different meal for them after a full day of work it’s not something I want to do, but now I’m wondering if I’m in the wrong here.

EDIT: The wedding was two weeks ago, she arrived on Friday as the wedding was Saturday morning. She is staying with us since and she didn’t gave us a date to go home, she said she would stay with us for about a month or less. And me and my husband are the ones that make the pre-prepared meals. We bought what we will need on Saturday and prepare them Sunday. We were not planning on having her over, she asked us if she could stay with us during the wedding party and we had the “food discussion” as soon as she arrived in our house. I still prepare my meals for the week.