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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/bleachdyeproblem on 2023-09-27 21:48:45.

Original Post-

I met with Zoe yesterday afternoon and we talked things over. I pointed out a lot of things that were brought up in the comments and presented them as the concerns of me and a couple of friends of mine, and not the concerns of the millions that saw it online. Turns out, she was part of those millions. Someone sent her one of tiktoks that my Reddit post was read in and she has been thinking about things.

She told me she felt a little embarrassed about this all being out there online, even if nobody knew who we are, and I apologized. I explained that I really didn’t have many people who weren’t involved in the wedding to speak with about this, and I needed the advice. She also apologized, and said that she realizes now that the bleaching was a completely out of line request. She said that since she’s only bleached her hair once, and because she’s naturally blonde to begin with, she didn’t know anything about the process for bleaching dark hair and didn’t know it would be so difficult, take so long, and could cause so much damage. She said looking back knowing what she knows now, she feels like she was a huge bitch. I reassured her that she wasn’t a bitch, she was just uneducated and passionate about something, and we clashed. We hugged it out, and things are good now.

About the wigs, there will be none. She’s scrapping the group blonde idea. I convinced her that she would stand out far better if her whole bridal party wasn’t blonde and that dark hair (and red hair) would work amazingly with her winter theme. The contacts are also being scrapped unless any of us decide we want to use theme. They’re a very piercing blue and kind of cool looking.

About the grandparents, Zoe said Frank’s family in Argentina isn’t of German descent, so nothing to wonder or argue about. She was however horrified when she put all those pieces together and thought about how it looked. She had really been thinking Elsa vibes, not Aryan Nation vibes, and that embarrassed her more than the story being out there by itself. She didn’t even know Nazis fled to South America after WWII.

Zoe has officially messaged everyone in the bridal party to let them know about the change of plans and to apologize for the outburst and the stress this put on everyone. She’s also very excited for us all to come up with a new hair/makeup look and to go dress shopping. Also, those who asked if the groomsmen were being held to the same standard, I don’t know, and after finally getting this whole fiasco over with, I didn’t care to ask.

Zoe and I have made up and everything’s fine now. Sorry if this update wasn’t the crazy story everyone was looking forward to!