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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/throwra_thatcoco on 2023-10-02 06:33:58.

Btw: am being purposely vague for the sake of anonymity.

I (30F) am in a very competitive surgical residency. Around this time of the year my allergies like to mess with me and I get nose bleeds sometimes. (Nothing too serious, but usually if I blow my nose a lot there’s blood spotting). Well one of my coworkers (31M) who’s a good friend noticed this. Well about a week ago he saw me blowing my nose again and jokingly said “Are you doing cocaine or something?”. I said no and explained my allergies and we just laughed. Now whenever he’d see me blowing my nose he’d say “stop doing that coke” and I reply something like “no” or “can’t stop, won’t stop”. (TO BE CLEAR I AM NOT DOING COKE AND HE KNOWS IM NOT, ITS JUST JOKING AND WHEN OTHER PEOPLE ARENT AROUND)

Well a couple weeks ago, a fellow resident (30F) who is in our year overheard us say that when she was outside the room we were in I guess and she reported me. Then I got called in and questioned, I explained the situation & how they can literally see on my medical chart I have a history of allergies, but they still drug tested me which of course came up negative, but I’m still gonna have to get drug tested routinely for the next month “just to be sure”. I was told I’m not in trouble or anything and can continue work, but it doesn’t make it any less embarrassing! Well I ended up finding out who it was that reported me. And I was so pissed because I literally could’ve gotten fired and my whole career would’ve been on the line.

Well a few days ago, I invited a most of my colleagues to a big event I’m having in a few weeks. I never confronted that colleague and have just been keeping my distance for the sake of professionalism and definitely did not invite her. The day after I sent the invitations out (which was a flier through direct message) the colleague approached me and asked me why didn’t I send her an invitation, guess she heard about it from others. I was honest and told her it was because she falsely reported me and almost got me fired. She said she was just trying to do what was right and I can’t blame her because the risk that I was high and operating on patients is too great. I said “I understand where you’re coming from, but instead of asking me about it you went directly to our superior and almost cost me my career., which you haven’t apologized for”. She said she wasn’t gonna apologize for doing the right thing. Then I said I had to check on a patient and walked away.

I get she was trying to do the right thing, but she ended up doing it to the wrong person and thinks she’s in the right. Well I disagree and don’t want her at my event now, but I do feel kind of bad for excluding her and am curious to if she is right and if I’m just being stubborn.

So AITA for excluding my worker for after she reported me and almost got me fired?