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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/No-Calendar-155 on 2023-10-02 18:08:35.

Hi, I’m planning a lovely bridesmaid entourage for my wedding consisting of: my beautiful sister and cousins. We are all on very good terms.

Today I told my sister I thought of navy blue dresses for bridesmaids. I sent her a couple pics very enthusiastically. I thought it’s elegant. Matches with the suits and gives a nice pop to the white wedding dress on pics.

The response from my sis was instant. ‘You can’t be serious! I won’t wear that. Everyone will hate that. Or is it that you want all of us to look like shit? I heard there are weddings where the bride wants to make bridesmaids look intentionally bad. That’s probably your plan.’’

She said her ‘color type’ is ‘autumn’ and navy looks the worst on that complexion. My cousins, she said, are also autumn and I will make them look the worst too.

After my heart sank I started looking for alternate colors on this ‘seasons color wheel’ thing. I sent her a couple of alternatives suggested. Different deep blues. She replied that she then doesn’t want to be my bridesmaid but wants to be pretty. She would attend all the getting ready with the girls but won’t wear the matching dress.

I read this happens in bridal parties. There is usually one difficult person. The suggestion is to ask them to step down as bridesmaid… for me it obviously didn’t come to that as my sis stepped down without discussion.

Her pov is that I should care about people feeling good at my wedding and I don’t have much empathy.

I cried for a bit then I told my sister honestly that after this I will have a sad and angry feeling every time I’d look at her at the wedding. In her pretty dress, being satisfied with herself at my expense. And maybe it’s best if she’s not there then.

AITA?