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The original was posted on /r/ukpersonalfinance by /u/WhatWillDid_ on 2023-10-02 14:17:09.

I’m starting to get sleepless nights and am often lost in my thoughts during the day, thinking about money.

Let’s get some basic ideas out of the way; I am incredibly fortunate and in a better financial situation than most. I know that. But what’s on the horizon is concerning for me in my situation.

My partner and I paid a deposit on a house with savings and a financial gift from my parents in April 2022.

Our current household income is circa £3,500 pcm.

House cost circa £300,000, our mortgage repayments which go up to Dec this year = circa £820 pcm. Our mortgage renewal quote, which we’re not quite locked in to, sees an increase to circa £1300 pcm.

In October last year, our son was born. He’s a perfect little boy. But even perfect little boys incur nursery fees. He’s going in twice per week - my partner has moved to working three days a week and I’m working a compressed hours 4 day week to cover care for the other 3 days a week. Worst case scenario depending on how the days fall in a month, nursery costs for 2 days a week =£640. So straight off the bat, to cover nursery and the mortgage rate rise, we’re looking at an additional £1100 pcm.

I work in London but we bought well outside London as it’s what we could afford so I’m at the whim of train fares. A return to London is roughly £70 and I’m expected in twice per week, at least.

Other costs, internet, life insurance, buildings and contents, car costs (we rarely drive), food - it’s all just getting too much. It’s the 2nd of the month and most of our costs have gone out. I have £400 left for the month, which has to cover rail fares, food, petrol and then any other costs that might pipe up.

I work in the public sector. I can’t negotiate a pay rise. I’ve applied for a promotion that I have a very good chance of getting, but that promotion would take me to a different place of work (HQ near Oxford) which would more than double my commute costs. I haven’t fully worked it out, but I think my pay rise would be more than completely eroded by the new commute.

Is anyone else in a similar situation? As I see it, when the new mortgage payments start going out, we can’t keep our heads above water any more. I’m looking at taking a second job - a pub job or maybe delivering for Amazon. Any advice on this from new parents who are doing the same?