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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/BirdMommy2809 on 2023-10-03 05:31:30.

My (24f) best friend (26f) is engaged and has asked me to be her wedding coordinator. I plan events for a living and the wedding is in a year and a half. When my friend, Dee, and her fiancé, Ray, asked me to coordinate, I set up a dinner with the bride, groom and their parents. Dee, Ray and I had been discussing the potential budget for what they had envisioned. Dee’s parents are putting up 1/3 of the money and Dee and Ray are putting up another 1/3. Rays mother said she couldn’t afford to help with the wedding and Dee’s father assured everyone that his father (Dee’s grandfather) stated he wanted to help with whatever other expenses were needed. I informed everyone that my job was the please the bride and groom and I would not under any circumstances go against their wishes or make a decision without their consent. At the time everyone seemed to be on the same page. Fast forward 6 months to last week. Dee and I settled on centerpieces for the table settings. I was at the store picking up material when I ran into Rays mother. We started chatted and I showed her the centerpiece idea (a lot of what we’re doing is DIY to cut cost). MIL made a face and said she didn’t like that and had her own ideas for what we could do. I told her I didn’t quite care. If she wanted to tell Dee her ideas and Dee tells me she’d like to change the centerpieces I’d do what I needed to do, otherwise I needed to go. A few days later I got a call from Ray saying I was out of line and if his mother wanted a certain kind of centerpiece than I should have brought that to Dee not told his mother I didn’t care about her wants for the wedding. I asked Ray what Dee had to say and he said she couldn’t talk right now but he was sure she agreed. I’ve known Dee since we were 12 and she’s never had a problem telling me when I am wrong. Dee’s mother called me and said I was being a bit of an asshole. Dee won’t answer my calls and I keep getting a call from an unknown number who I am assuming is Rays mother. I think I did exactly what I would’ve wanted someone else to do especially knowing my mother likes to butt in where she has no say. But maybe I could’ve said it nicer? AITA? Edit: I work in event planning not wedding planning. I am not getting paid to do this. I was asked by my friend. “Being tact” is not apart of my job. The company/person who pays for the event gets an opinion and that’s all. I’ve had one instance like this in my professional life and I handled it the same way. I’ve been told trying to be polite can sometimes come off as being a doormat or that person may think they can get away with bullying me into the idea. Just for the people who keep mentioning I need to be more professional in my job