Final Update: AIO for threatening to take my sister to court after her toddler destroyed my $2,000 gaming setup because she said I should’ve “baby-proofed my apartment”?

Lemmit.Online bot · 2 days ago

Final Update: AIO for threatening to take my sister to court after her toddler destroyed my $2,000 gaming setup because she said I should’ve “baby-proofed my apartment”?

Spacehooks@reddthat.com · 1 day ago

Sister had serious internal issues. Im shocked she didn’t beat her kid to feel powerful.

Spacehooks@reddthat.com · 1 day ago

BIL offered to take my PC to the store that originally built it for me, just to see what was fixable. I agreed, but asked for something in writing just so I had some peace of mind. We put together a little agreement that he’d be responsible for it while it was with him. Yeah, yeah, it was just a formality and would not hold much merit anywhere, but it helped me feel a bit more in control.

On Monday, he dropped it off at the shop and gave them my number so they could keep me updated. He also told me he confronted my sister about how things played out. I sent him my original Reddit post too, he read the comments and apparently showed them to her. She still hasn’t unblocked me, and from what I’ve heard, was not happy about the fact my BIL is actually listening to me.

I also shared the post and some comments with my parents and brother since no one really believed me before. My parents still don’t fully get it, but they’ve at least stopped pushing back. My brother is more understanding now, though for some reason he mostly wanted to talk about how many people saw the post. I don’t think either of those three still care, really, and I’m fine if they see this. Do better.

Anyway, I went to see the PC today (wednesday here). The shop said it’s mostly salvageable. It needs a very very careful internal clean and a few fans replaced, and some wiring fixed, but overall the main parts survived somehow. BIL told me he’ll cover the cost of the repair, no hesitation.

When I brought up what my sister said about not being able to pay even $200, he said she’s lying. He also said he’s not sure Max actually did all the damage. He thinks the door was left open on purpose, or that my sister might have even done some of it herself. Based on the height of the tower and where the crackers ended up, it didn’t quite add up to a toddler acting alone.

Apparently, she’s been telling him I have a “gambling addiction” (I did get a bit hooked on Genshin like 4 years ago I guess?) and that maybe this whole thing will “wake me up,” which is… new. She used to be supportive or at least indifferent. No idea where that switch came from.

So yeah. That’s where we’re at:

My PC is being cleaned up and fixed, and BIL is covering the cost. Sister still has me blocked and won’t talk to me. Still tempted to start something with her tbh, especially if she actually did all of this on purpose. Still not ruling out small claims court depending on how things go. Thanks again to everyone who responded to the original post. Seeing how many people understood what happened really helped me hold the line with my family when I felt like I was losing my mind.

One thing I’ve been turning over in my head lately is what if my sister did do something to my setup on purpose?

I don’t want to believe that, it feels like a stretch, but the more I think about it, the less so, I guess…? But then I remember how she acted when I asked her to keep Max out of the office. The eye-roll and the “he’s just curious” comments like she didn’t take any of it seriously…??? And now hearing from my BIL that she’s been saying I have a “crippling gambling/gaming/whatever addiction” and needed to “grow up”???

It’s just… weird. She used to be cool about it. Never super into games herself, but she got that it was important to me. If something changed, I don’t know when or why. And if this was some weird way to make a point or “teach me a lesson”… that’s messed up. You’re not our mom. How about talking first instead of this? I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but the more I think about it, the less it makes sense that Max could’ve done all of that alone. It’s sick if she blamed her own son for it.

So yeah. Not accusing anyone outright, but that thought is there now.

And if you’re my sister reading this… Which I’m guessing you are, because I bet you’d love to look at the comments that are on your side a lot. :)))

I don’t know why you blocked me. I don’t know what shifted in your head about all this. But if you actually had anything to do with damaging my setup whether it was on purpose or just through complete carelessness… Fuck. You. You know I worked hard for that. You know what that rig meant to me, and you know I would never do something like this to your stuff.

And if Max really did all of it on his own… I hope you’re paying closer attention now. Not for my sake, but for his. Read the comments on my first post again, from other parents and people with younger siblings who CLEARLY know better than you. That’s all.

Thanks for reading, those who did.

Some of OOP’s Comments:

Commenter: Wait - I thought the whole family was blowing up your phone telling you how mean you were?

OOP: Yes a week ago, before my first post. Is there something I can clarify for you here? My sister was talking incredible smack about me to them, making it seem like I ”screamed at her child” over a ”minor mistake.” I do see the people going ”haha blowing up her phone” and I do not understand what is wrong with the wording?

Commenter: I think chatgpt is being used a lot on Reddit lately, especially in AITA type subs and a common indicator that it’s a fake post is that AI always uses the “blowing up my phone” phrase so that’s probably why they’re questioning it

OOP: Ohh… I see. 🤣 Thank you for clarifying! Beep, boop.

Commenter: I’m really glad things are turning for the better. But what about the other damages (Gaming chair, keyboard, etc)?

OOP: My chair is okay, the cushion, legs and back are stained with red permanent marker but I’ve learned to live with it. Coworkers and I are trying to find a chemical to fix the situation on the cushions, but an ethanol solution (small amounts, i dont want to ruin the chair further) has slowly been working at cleaning the other parts. (being a janitor does have its perks) Keyboard… ehh. I could not find all of the keycaps that were pulled off. I replaced the missing ones with an old keyboard’s ones (both mechanical) so it’s a bit awkward but it works for now. I might get custom ones for it if I find some that fit. The cracked monitor on the other hand needs to be replaced. I guess calling it ”cracked” was a kindness in itself. Still got the other two left and at least it wasnt the most expensive one… but yeah. 3:

Commenter: Um, why aren’t you just having your bil pay for a new keyboard and monitor? Or professional cleaning for the chair? That’s all part of the repairs.

OOP: We are waiting to see if my sister confesses to anything. If so, she will be paying out of her own pocket (and paying back), not my BIL. If she confesses and refuses, then, well… 👨‍⚖️📝🔒 The computer is essential, but the keyboard works and I still have two monitors. Thats why I am willing to wait for the other damage to be solved.

The ‘addiction’:

I’ll admit, during covid, I did spend $300 on Ganyu when she came out, but that was the ’worst’ of it. (And it was so worth it) I don’t play much anymore, (mostly stuck on Marvel Rivals rn) but the overall margin from Genshin release to this day I’ve spent under $600. I get it, even that might look crazy to people who don’t play video games, but sheesh. GAMBLING addiction…? Bruh. She should be more concerned of what I spend on Pokemon packs in this economy, if she’s gotta be concerned over something. 🤣🤣🤣

Spacehooks@reddthat.com · 1 day ago

Title: My [25F] sister [30F] is spiraling but I don’t know how or if I should help.

A few weeks ago, I made a post (not here) about how my sister’s toddler [3M] almost destroyed my PC setup. Long story short, she and her son were staying with me for one night, he got into my office, and the whole setup got wrecked with juice and cracker bits shoved into the tower. The situation was awful, and when I asked my sister for help covering the damage, she made an excuse and blamed me instead.

It became whole family drama. My sister blocked me and acted like the whole thing was my fault, but her husband (my BIL) reached out on his own. He checked the damage himself, helped take the PC in for repairs, and ended up covering the costs because he was genuinely embarrassed by the way she acted. He even started questioning whether their toddler could have done that much damage on his own, especially after the kid couldn’t even open the door by himself. My BIL thought maybe my sister left it open or did something herself.

Within a week of that, my BIL confronted her and well, she kicked him out of the house. Like, full-on, told him to get the hell out, packed up his things, dumped them and left them by the curb like he was a stray dog. He told me she screamed that he was “betraying her” and “taking the side of that fucking Reddit bitch,” meaning me. She also apparently accused him of conspiring and cheating on her with me to “humiliate her publicly,” which… What???

She hasn’t let him see their kid since. No visits. No phone calls. She’s gone full black hole mode and is completely unreachable, threatening cops if he goes near. She’s blocked me, my brother, even some extended family, and is only talking to our parents, who are still enabling her but I think its only so they can keep Max at arm’s lenght.

Meanwhile, I’m hearing rumors she’s been telling people I’m unhinged, psychotic, and that I made the whole thing up. She told one of our cousins that I “lured” her kid into the office like some kind of trap or setup.

I don’t know if this is postpartum-related, or if something snapped, or if she’s just always been this vindictive and I didn’t want to see it. But I’m scared. Scared for her kid. Scared for her husband. And yeah I’m also scared for myself, because if she’s willing to ruin her whole marriage and turn the family against me just to protect a lie…?

My parents want to keep it under wraps, but I know my BIL wants to get her help. I want to get her help too, but I don’t know where to start or what to do.

What can I start with to possibly push her towards someone who can help her out? Has someone here dealt with a situation like this before? I feel helpless, as I know she is an adult and has free-will but I fear for her safety and my nephew’s safety as well…

My BIL voiced wanting to divorce her and told my parents he will get his son whether they approve or not. His side of the family is furious with mine and I’ve no idea where I stand because yeah, I guess I started this.

Is this salvageable? If so, how? What can I do? Who can I contact within the states…? Is there anything I can do even? Does anyone know?

Top Comments:

LhasaApsoSmile: I think your parents need to talk to her because this is crazy. The kid did what 3 yo’s do but she failed as a mother by not minding him. Your BIL stepped up to fix it. But her reaction is nuts. There has to be more here. I think your parents are in a better place to figure out what is going on.

Update Post 3: June 25, 2025 (over 1.5 months from previous post, 2.5 from OG)

Hello everyone,

It’s been a while, so I didn’t want to post this on AIO, but for those still interested in my situation, here’s an update. :)

The good news first:

My PC is fully functional again. The store was able to recover it! My nephew is now in a safe and stable environment with my brother-in-law. Unfortunately, there have also been some difficult developments:

My brother-in-law is currently in the process of separating from my sister. It seems I’ve essentially been disowned by my mother, and now, it appears, by my father as well. The only one still in contact with me is my brother. Thank you to those who have checked in or supported me during all this. It truly means a lot.

OOP’s Comments:

Commenter: Good to hear things are fixed with th pc now, but that’s awful that you’ve been disowned by your parents. Why did they do that? Unless I’m remembering wrong, they were only in contact with her to have access to their grandkid.

Sounds like you’re in the middle of a lot right not so I won’t push, but I wish you luck. Just know that people are on your side and are praying for you 🙏

OOP: Thank you! I am very happy to hear that. My parents have unfortunately been swayed by my sister’s lies. I guess I can say that she is of the mind that BIL was cheating on her with me and that we want to “steal her son.” I am still trying to cope with what has happened (poorly, but work and studies keep me busy thankfully…) and to clear the air. There is a lot happening as you guessed, but I’ll give out more updates after everything settles down. Right now I’m just taking it one day at a time.

Commenter: I’m glad your nephew is safe! Try to keep that connection - he’ll appreciate it in the future.

I wish you the best of luck with the rest of the family. It’s not your fault & you need to work to accept that. Maybe find a therapist to talk this thru with? You need to protect your mental health. I’m also a younger sister & I took on way too much of trying to fix things when I was your age.

OOP: Thank you for the advice! Therapy hadn’t even crossed my mind… I’ll look into it for sure!

Spacehooks@reddthat.com · 1 day ago

New Update *****Final Update Post: October 2, 2025 (3.5 months later, 6 from OG post)*****

Hey everyone. This is the final update to my posts on r/AmIOverreacting :

AIO for threatening to take my sister to court after her toddler destroyed my $2,000 gaming setup because she said I should’ve “baby-proofed my apartment”? [UPDATE] AIO for threatening to take my sister to court after her toddler destroyed my $2,000 gaming setup because she said I should’ve “baby-proofed my apartment”? It’s been a long while since I last posted, and honestly I wasn’t sure if I wanted to give another update at all. A lot has happened over the past six months, some of it good, some of it really heavy, and some of it that I’m still struggling to process. But I know a lot of you followed the whole thing from the beginning and my direct messages have been full of so many awesome, supportive people, I feel as if I owe all of you a final update before letting this matter go.

First, the positives: My PC is alive and well and has been for a while. The shop did a miracle job restoring it and it’s running beautifully again. It almost feels symbolic now, like after everything blew up in my life, at least this one thing that mattered to me is still standing. xd

I’ve also gotten closer to my brother-in-law (well, ex-BIL now, I guess, though it feels weird to call him that since he’s still family to me). He has full custody of my nephew, and that little kid is thriving. He’s calmer, happier, and honestly just a joy to be around in ways I didn’t even realize before. And he turned four after all the court stuff ended, so we could have his birthday in peace!!! :)

My BIL has his own family helping him, and I’ve been pitching in too whenever I can. It’s exhausting at times, but I don’t regret a second of it. My nephew deserves stability, and my BIL deserves support after everything he’s had to go through. Watching him step up as a single dad has been inspiring.

Now for the complicated part: my family.

When things first went down, my parents were still on my sister’s side, and I was basically the black sheep. But something happened during the legal proceedings that made them realize she wasn’t well and that I hadn’t been exaggerating about any of it. For the first time in what feels like forever, they stopped defending her blindly. They actually reached out to me, apologized, and admitted they’d been wrong… well, kind of. But I couldn’t be asked to escalate it again. It’s been slow, but they’ve been trying to rebuild things with me. Part of me resents that it took them this much to finally see the truth, but I’m also relieved not to be completely estranged from my parents anymore. I’m still trying to decide what kind of a relationship they deserve to have with me after all of this.

As for my sister…

I don’t even know how to start. During the custody battle, she completely broke down. A lot of stuff came out, including the fact that she had broken and damaged other people’s things in the past (friends, her coworker’s stuff), intentionally. She admitted she did it because, in her words, BIL “owed her more” as the mother of their child, and destroying things was her way of “making him notice her.”

She also said something else that stuck with me: that when she broke things, she felt powerful. She said people underestimated her, ignored her, treated her like she was just “a mom.” But when she destroyed something, she knew she couldn’t be ignored. It forced people to react, and it sure did. I know some of the people witnessing this in real time still pity her, which… I don’t know how to feel about it.

Still, it explains so much of her behavior, not just with the PC, but with her marriage, with our family and how she’s spiraled. She wanted to feel like she mattered, but instead of asking for help in a healthy way or seeking support, she turned to control and destruction. And when that wasn’t enough, she escalated.

Writing that out makes me feel so sad, honestly. It’s like everything I suspected about the PC wasn’t just a suspicion. And to think all of this could have been avoided if she sought help or accepted going to couple’s therapy properly. Apparently my BIL had suggested it a few times to her, but she declined.

After she lost custody of my nephew, things spiraled fast. She had a complete breakdown, and long story short, she’s now in jail awaiting transfer to a psychiatric facility. I don’t want to go into every detail, but it’s safe to say it’ll be a long time before I see her again. Or want to see her again.

And here’s the part I can’t quite make peace with: I feel bad for her.

I know that might sound crazy after everything she put me through, after how she tore our family apart, and after what she did to her own son. But she’s still my sister. There’s this ache I can’t quite get rid of, because I don’t know if the person she is now is who she always was, or if something in her just snapped along the way. I look back on our childhood and teenage years and wonder if there were signs that I missed, if there was some pattern of behavior I brushed off as moodiness or sibling rivalry that was actually something worse.

What complicates those feelings even more is everything that happened after my posts started spreading. I never expected them to blow up the way they did. I just wanted an outside perspective because my whole family was gaslighting me, making me feel insane for protecting my own belongings. And then, suddenly, it was everywhere. On Twitter, YouTube, Tiktok, even some news article was made about it. Someone tagged me to let me know that Smosh had even featured my story, which was surreal and honestly sort of humiliating in its own way. (Even though being noticed was kind of cool, I guess?)

Strangers were debating my family like it was some kind of reality TV show, and I had no control over it. At first, I was grateful for the validation, but over time, it started to eat away at my conscience. Keeping my posts public turned out to be a mistake.

I know hindsight is 20/20, but I regret not locking them down sooner. By the time BIL’s lawyer told us it would be best to hide everything, the damage had already been done. My sister had already seen the comments and the full force of the internet turned against her. And she hyperfixated on it.

Spacehooks@reddthat.com · 1 day ago

That is not just me speculating either, one of our cousins told me she would rant constantly about it during the legal proceedings, always bringing it back to the posts and how I had “publicly humiliated her.” Apparently, she would spend hours scrolling, trying to dig up my posts, looking for new comments, even after I hid them. It was like pouring salt in a wound, and she couldn’t stop picking at it.

I keep asking myself if I made things worse by letting it all stay up as long as it did. If I gave her more ammunition for her paranoia orr if I pushed her further toward the breakdown that ended with her losing everything. Part of me feels like I failed her, like maybe if I had been more careful, she wouldn’t have spiraled so badly. But then another part of me reminds myself that it wasn’t the internet that broke her, it was something already inside her. The posts didn’t cause her to smash my PC, or to lash out at BIL, or to neglect her own child. Those were choices she made long before Reddit ever came into the picture.

I realize there’s no point in deleting them. Even if I scrubbed my entire account clean, the internet never forgets. Copies are out there somewhere, archived and dissected on forums I’ll never even see. I can’t control that, no matter how much I might want to. What I can control is how I move forward, how I take care of myself, my nephew, and the family I still have.

The truth is, moving forward has been a mixed bag. On one hand, my daily life feels lighter without the constant chaos of my sister’s presence. I’m not coming home to find something broken, I’m not waking up to accusatory texts, and I’m not walking on eggshells waiting for the next outburst. That alone has been a kind of freedom I didn’t realize how badly I needed. On the other hand, there’s this strange emptiness where she used to be. Even if her presence was destructive, she was still there, part of the fabric of my family, and now there’s just this jagged hole.

My nephew asks about her sometimes. He doesn’t fully understand what happened, of course. He just knows “mommy is sick” and can’t take care of him right now. BIL and I try to keep our answers simple, but the truth is, I don’t know what kind of relationship, if any, he’ll be able to have with her in the future. I think about that a lot, because no matter how much I’ve been hurt by her, I can’t help but imagine what it’ll feel like for him one day when he’s old enough to learn the truth. How do you explain to a child that their mother did what my sister has done? How can it ever make sense to him? I don’t know what to do when the day comes that either BIL or I have to explain what happened.

As for me, I’ve been in therapy since all of this started (recommended by some of the lovely people in the comments and in my direct messages, thank you.) At first, it was just a way to vent, but it’s become essential, to be honest. My therapist keeps reminding me that none of this is my fault and that my sister’s choices were her own, that I didn’t “ruin her life” by posting about the PC, and that it’s not my job to fix her. I hope to one day believe everything that my therapist is telling me.

As for my sister, I don’t know what the future holds for her, or if she’ll ever get better.

But if anyone else has problems like this, maybe be a bit more careful than I was. I spent the last months worrying I’d get charged with something for causing emotional turmoil over a Reddit post.

On a positive note, the stress caused me to get reconnected with an old hobby, retro electronics! Did you know the 3DS is considered retro now? I didn’t! I feel old! I’m the same age as Pokemon Crystal!!!

Anyways, from now on I will be focusing on graduating and working to help my BIL pay off the debt that accumulated during the legal proceedings/investigation. But now that it’s over, it’s nice to know that at least for the coming months, things should be peaceful for me and those who matter the most to me. :)

Thank you to everyone who followed this from the beginning. ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Some of OOP’s Comments:

Commenter: The only thing I can tell you is that you’re not wrong for feeling bad for your sister. This is not advice that you should forgive her, to be clear. But she was (and is, debatably!) an important part of your life, feeling bad for her is normal empathy for your loved ones. I hope she finds a way to process her mental issues and is able to authentically and meaningfully make amends to you and your family.

Regarding posting everything online: I mean, yeah, with the benefit of hindsight, it probably would have been better to delete the posts as soon as you got the insight you needed, but that seal is already long-since broken. Deleting at this point is no good, given how many times it’s been reposted/commentated on.

OOP: Thank you, you really hit the nail on the head. I’m not ready to forgive, but I can still feel for her. It’s a weird, heavy mix of emotions. I appreciate your thoughtful words and hope for healing, however long it takes. :)

Commenter: What an update ! […] And did you ever find out if your nephew actually touched your PC, or it was all done by your sister (the crackers, apple juice…) ?

OOP: Yes, I guess Reddit really does love a “saga” like this. And yes, all the crackers and juice were 100% my sister. -_- …Thank you for your kind words!

Commenter: […] Also, don’t feel bad about blogging about this. It may have added fuel to your sister’s struggle…but if you hadn’t either (a) she would have found something else to be paranoid about/obsess over (as is common in mental health issues) or (b) may have been able to continue sweeping her issues under the rug and never gotten the help she needs.

OOP: That’s a really thoughtful perspective. You’re right, if it hadn’t been the posts, it might’ve been something else. I appreciate the reassurance and your kindness. Thank you!

Therapy for nephew and forgive yourself:

I agree, therapy has already helped me a lot, and I’m looking into it for my nephew too. (I believe my BIL may have been recommended something after the court case for custody ended?) Thank you for the reminder to forgive myself, that part is a work in progress. I’ll try to update down the road if things shift more, maybe in a few years at least. I’m a bit over the internet right now. xd

Commenter: […]Side Note: Out of curiosity – what is the PC that you got and the monitors? (Asking as a person who is looking for a gaming PC)

OOP: There’s something really comforting in what you shared, thank you. Sibling dynamics can be a lot. My PC is a custom build, but here are the parts its made of. (It may be long x_@) Case: be quiet! Pure Base 500DX Case Fans: ARCTIC P12 PWM PST A-RGB 0dB RAM: Corsair Vengeance RGB 32GB (2 x 16GB) Storage: Kingston 2TB NV2 PCIe 4.0 NVMe SSD Power Supply: Asus TUF Gaming 850W Motherboard: Asus PRIME Z790-P WIFI CPU Cooler: ARCTIC Freezer 36 A-RGB Graphics Card: Asus GeForce RTX 4060 Ti ProArt OC Edition 8GB GDDR6 Processor: Intel Core i7-13700K – LGA1700, 16-core (8P+8E), 3.4GHz Base Clock, 30MB Note for this one (the processor) ^^ I don’t recommend getting 13th-14th gen Intel processors, there’s a running BIOS issue that was discovered last year and the one I have needed to be fixed. (The store let me know of it while my computer was being fixed and they updated my BIOS for me.) <_< Honestly I don’t recommend Intel Processors in general. Also, my computer is 1,5 years old (it runs very nicely right now, but still) and I am not a professional. But it has not blown up! And I think that’s pretty good. :3 Thanks again for the kind words!

Commenter: What did you sister do to end up in jail?

OOP: I’m not comfortable sharing specifics about that online, but I can say it was very serious. I understand if people doubt me, but my priority is keeping my family’s privacy protected. Thank you for understanding.

Editor’s note: I did message OOP a couple of months ago (after the BORU’s had been up for awhile) to see if she wanted me to take the original BORU’s down, but didn’t receive a response. However, she has now made her original posts visible to everyone again in the last few days, so seems to be ok with them being out there again.

Final Update: AIO for threatening to take my sister to court after her toddler destroyed my $2,000 gaming setup because she said I should’ve “baby-proofed my apartment”?

Final Update: AIO for threatening to take my sister to court after her toddler destroyed my $2,000 gaming setup because she said I should’ve “baby-proofed my apartment”?

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